Shocking reports have reached us suggesting that current Union President Olly Birrell attempted to pass a motion where he could, theoretically, waive students’ right for an election and simply declare himself president for life.
The news, which comes at an awkward time for the much respected figure, was passed to us by a source who wishes not to be named but did say this:
"It’s scary, when someone goes crazy on power like that. He was running around, ordering people to ‘do his bidding’. I couldn’t believe it. What kind of democracy is that?"
It is believed the plan hit a stumbling block when current media editor Sarah Powell refused to back Birrell’s controversial motion, leaving him without a state news organisation, vital for a true dictatorship.
More as soon as we hear it.